Diary Of A Hollywood Refugee

Saturday, April 30, 2005

SomeWhere In Time

Blogging is an interesting experience. I write for myself,and rarely do I ever expect anything I write to have much meaning or impact on anyone, so I have to admit I am always surprised when I receive comments from people who have been effected by what I write. I have come to understand that sometimes my writing can be very evocative, and garners some kind of visceral reaction in others.

Melt Away was a much needed cathartic release for me from the anger, frustration, and hurt I felt at the unnecessary loss of a friendship I valued greatly; yet it seems to have triggered a visceral reaction in others. I hope that whatever it touched in others, even if painful, provided a much needed purgative experience, a spiritual cleansing.

My recent entry, Dark Stain, was a reflection on events that had transpired YEARS ago. Seeing Jane Fonda back in the spotlite, reflecting on her misguided belief of how SHE brought an end to our involvement in Viet Nam, and that her actions were righteous and supportive of our troups(wingnut!!)infuriated me, but also brought back a pleasant memory of a chance encounter on Thanksgiving Day that filled me with great joy. I haven't experienced any loss or sadness related to that time in my life. It's been well over 7 years since that Thanksgiving Day, and it was inevitable that I would lose touch with the remaining two vets; it's part of the ebb and flow of life.

It's clear from the comments I received, that in someway I left people with the impression that I was in pain over this, so for inadvertantly creating that impression, I must apologize. It wasnt my intention, but I do thank everyone for their kind words. I look back on those times spent together with great joy, with laughter, with love.

It's s the unnecessary loss of a friendship, that I experienced this earlier this week, which has saddened me greatly, and continues to so; perhaps it is that sadness which seaped into my Dark Stain post.

If there was any emotion I was trying to convey in Dark Stain, it was ANGER.

I am REALLY REALLY MAD about the Dark Stain that many still refuse to acknowledge exists when it comes to those vets who served in Nam and have never been given the appreciation, respect, admiration, and gratitude they deserve. They never got a decent homecoming, and that both angers and saddens me deeply.

A small act of kindness towards two vets just doesn't seem to be enough...it doesnt balance things out...there are too many other vets who did not benefit directly from that act of kindness. That bothers me.

Yet I've come to understand that while one person's actions might only directly touch one or two people, those very actions reach out beyond that one moment in time, across eternity, to touch ALL of humanity and then return back to us somewhere in time.


  • At 2:58 PM, May 01, 2005, Anonymous BillT said…

    "A small act of kindness towards two vets just doesn't seem to be enough...it doesnt balance things out..."

    No, it doesn't, but it adds some balance to the equation, nonetheless. And I'll bet that which appeared a small act of kindness in your eyes was transformed into something infinitely greater in theirs--an acknowledgement of who they were, and that what they did had meaning...

    ...even if it was only to you.

  • At 8:05 PM, May 01, 2005, Blogger Huntress said…

    You always seem to have the most amazing insight to share with me, Bill.

    Thank you!

  • At 9:06 PM, May 01, 2005, Anonymous cw4(ret)billt said…

    Insight requires inspiration. You handle *that* quite well, Lady Huntress!

  • At 12:58 AM, May 03, 2005, Blogger Sgt. B. said…

    I concur... With the both of you... Sometimes somebody has to dig deep down and tap into those deep emotions and bring them to the light.
    You've got to clear away the dead stuff before you can renew the live stuff...


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